parsley sage rosemary thyme

I want to permanately straighten my hair and dip dye my ends brown.

So I can look sexy again l!k3 d1$

define: Melancholic

I didn't do well. I'm already dreading the results.

The day started pretty crappily because when you go into the testing room, you're supposed to bring your proof of identification and your admission ticket. And I didn't realize this until everyone was filling out their Answer sheets with their name, date, numbers and shiz. And I literally freaked out with a mini heart attack. And the asian lady wouldn't let me out. So basically, when we started the test, I had to run out of the room and get my admission ticket. Sounds easy? Well, it's not. There were soo many fucking bags outside and I wore my $2 Cotton On bag with the bird on it which EVERY SINGLE CONFORMIST HAS. And so I spent like 54938504 minutes searching for my bag and retrieving the darned admission ticket and running with break neck speed back into the testing room. This resulted in me in not finishing section 1.

I did not fucking finish section 1.
I'm not kidding/exaggerating. I guessed the last EIGHT FUCKING QUESTIONS!! EIGHT!!!! So yeah...

Okay, section 2. This is usually my best section and I can usually finish heaps early. But I did bad. I know I did bad. With section 2, you think you do good... and you do do good. If you think you did bad, than you probably did do bad. And I think I did bad. I think section 3 was probably the best. But I'm still soo nervous about it. I couldn't do about ten of the questions.

Overall, it was shit. I'm preparing for the worst. But please, oh some divine being up there, please please please let me pass all sections. Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee!

this is beautiful (source: tumblr)

I went home and had a little cry with mum. She was suprisingly chill about it but underneath she was both disappointed and bitter. I think she was acting nice only for my sake because she could tell that I was genuinely distressed. Fuck. I can't believe my whole future is basically decided on this exam. Well, the easy way to a good future. I'm going to try for Bond. Sadly, I don't even know if I can get in.

expectations

<< Est. '10 When I thought I was cool

Okay, the UMAT is fast approaching. It seems not soon enough yet at the same time too soon. I'm not doing well. Mum is suprisingly blasé about it, yet hidden underneath that exterior, I know she's disappointed. I guess, I'd rather anger than disappointment because when she's angry, I can usually fight back with little qualms. But when she's disappointed in me, I can feel my stomach sinking and my palms grow cold with guilt.

Please give me strength, luck and drive on Wednesday. Please.

bane

I wrote this a while ago...

Okay, this is what I got on Thursday. So I got that floppy felt black hat from Jeanswest for only $20 (sister paid). It was discounted and I tried to see how much it was beforehand but I accidentally ripped the original price, reuslting in an obscure figure of $_4.99. Thus, in order to make myself feel better about saving money, I'm going to pretend it was originally $34.99. Okay, the second item is the stockings with the dots in them. Orginally, I was going to get the tattoo ones from Sportsgirl but I decided to purchase these from Big W. Guess how much? Ten freaking dollars. So expensive. Yet my sister paid. It was maddening because I went to Jeanswest later to discover they were only $8. Asdfghjkl;. The third item is the darker coloured knit sweater, I got it with my own money (suprise) in the city at Paperscissors. It used to be $34.99 and I purchased it for $15.99! Yet, it was still expensive in my eyes. Okay, lastly I got the off the shoulder rust coloured knit sweater dress for $79.95. My sister obviously paid for that. And she got one for herself as well. So all in all, she spent $110 on me. She is honestly the most amazing (and richest) sister I could ever ask for. I want to buy her a Herve Leger dress one day. Because she won't shut up about his dresses. I will.

Side note: We also bought my dad a shirt from Jeanswest. It's part of a Godfather T-shirt series and it's got a picture of 'The Don.' Hilarious. I don't think he'll ever wear it.

resolve

Academic Summary:
Suprisingly, probably for the first time in history, my parents weren't forthrightly mad at my results. Perhaps, disappointed but not outright angry. I guess, the reason for this is, I didn't do badly yet I didn't do great or as well as I hoped. It is true that if I were still at State High and I attained these results, I would be stressing, under constant onslaught of fury from mother and just plain disheartened. Even so, I hope to God that my school does well in QCS.
Accounting
There was a time where I thought that I could perhaps even top this subject. That time has obviously passed. I couldn't even get an A grade. I was graded with A+ on the assignment and B+ in the exam, all assesment pieces in Accounting amount to the same. Yet because this subject is different in a way I can't really explain, it is cummulative. Thus, this semester I achieved A B+ B+ meaning an overall of B+. If I don't get all As next semester, I will not be guaranteed an overall of an A. Period.
Biology
Okay, last year I was horrible at Biology. I got B-s and the occasional C+. Yet, this year has entirely turned around for me. My biology teacher recently told me I'm in the top 20 of Biology students and I'm on to go on an excursion to the Queensland Institute of Medical Research along with nineteen other girls. I was speechless. In a good way. Even so, my grades aren't even amazing, leading me to believe I'm probably in the latter half of this top twenty: A A A-
Chemistry
Last year I did so well in Chemistry, it was my favourite subject. And then in term one, I got my results back and I got A- C+ B+. I think I died. Upon reading those results. I was in shock and I was so fucking sad that I felt numb. Yet, in term two I resolved to work that much harder and it has paid off. For the extended experimental investigation, I got A+ A+ A+. Bringing my semester overall for Chemistry to A- A- A+
English
I try so hard. And in term two, I finally cracked into the A grade but my overall is still a B+. On the three assesment pieces of semester one, I achieved B+, B++ and A. This brings my overall, according to the teacher, to an A- however, she said some bull**** about the machine processing this as a B+. Thus, on my report card, it appears as a B+
Information Technology
I regret choosing this subject; it is time consuming, not good for my OP and stressful. There's too much work and I don't even know why I chose this subject. Despite all these misgivings, I'm doing quite well. This semester overall is A- A A
Mathematics B
First term I did well. I was shocked and pleasantly suprised because I actually cried after the first exam. Yet, I managed to get straight As. Second term, I did shithouse. I walked out of the exam, knowing I did shit. I didn't cry this time, even though I was so close, and mum kept giving me false hope like 'Remember in term one when you cried but you managed to get an A?' But this time, I knew like I actually knew, I wouldn't get an A. I was right. To my disappointment I got A B B+. However, there was also an assignment, I'm unsure as to how much an assignment is worth but I got A A A-. Therefore, thankfully, my overall is A A- A-

bleak

UMATing in SLQ

The past two days have been tumultuous. I've been happy, devastated, hopeful, angry as well as being a complete bitch to all within my immediate family. All this, because ever since I left the TSxpo, I've been angry at myself. Asking all these different universities, the perequisites, the figures of how many applicants and successful applicants they receive, the OP requirement and the ideal UMAT score, has made me realize how foolish my dreams are. All my hopes and wishes and daydreams seem to be nothing, out of my reach, impossible. And I don't know what to do. My UMATs not improving. I don't know if I have the will to maintain and improve my grades. I have no back-up plan.

Waste away. Or rise and take control.

hey monday

Monday was, despite it being a Monday, fun. Monday signals the beginning of another long week, the first day of school, but in these holidays, it just means laziness and excitement intermingled. Yeah, that didn't make sense. Eurghh, school starts soon. Which means UMAT is almost here on my doorstep.
  

We decided to bake and finish our LOTR marathon. We arranged to meet at 10am and as usual, everyone was late, heh. We rented the last movie, Return of the King, because we weren't in the mood for dodgy pirated copies. We also rented Sleeping Beauty, despite Joe's protests of TOY STORY THREEEEE. We shopped at Aldi for some lollies, had a late breakfast/late lunch at Mos Burgers. I had the rice burger with Yakinuki? I think.

We went into Coles and purchased our ingredients, we wandered into the fruit section and I was like "Eww, why are we getting apples? I don't want healthy food. I want junk food." And then there was silence, in which we burst out laughing because Joe pointed out that were making apple pie, APPLE pie. So that was an awkward blonde moment for me there. We also got microwave popcorn, chips, self-raising flower and cookie dough, just to name a few items. Did I mention that she has the cutest ever cat!! But she bullies it and it hated us, nevertheless is was adorable!

And we casually walked home with a trolley (so illegal) and died from the enormity of these houses (ie. the photo abovebovebove). We watched LOTR and in the meanwhile, made our apple pies. WE MADE OUR OWN PASTRY. Like no joke, we made our own pastry!! We rolled it, kneaded it, shaped it, hit it you name it. And while we were waiting, we also made the cookies (albeit from cookie dough) and they were really nice. We decorated our pies with Harry Potter scars, in appreciation for the last ever Harry Potter movie coming out!! They're going to make remakes of Harry when we're older but we'll be like 'Nahh, we were there for the original. It's our generation!' Moving on, once the pies were cooked, we were amazed. It was soo freaking delicious. I know everyone says that about their own cooking, but I'm not even exaggerating (much), it was absolutely mouth-watering. We should be on Masterchef. Who knew Joe could cook...

As you can see, we also made a mini mutant pie. We were just about to watch Sleeping Beauty and because LOTR was 192 minutes, we decided to have dinner. Yes, we eat alot. We went out to the line of shops opposite Time Square and had Korean hot pot. Holy shit, it was really yummy although rather spicey. But I intend to go back. Afterwards, we felt like an adventure and went to Market Square. It was dark, freezing cold and we were laughing like maniacs because of Slutines attire. She was wearing too big converse, a maxi skirt, leggings, thirty layers and her senior jersey. She kept trying, in vain, to tuck her skirt into her jersey in that she looked preggers. Later, we went back home and watched Sleeping Beauty. Sighs. If only some of that were real.

 

And then at around 8.30ish, I get a call from sister dearest informing me that my report card had arrived!! I proceeded to discover that my parents had not waited for me and opened my report card. But what did I expect? It's mum, of course she'd do that. So we chatted a bit and sister was like, 'Oh yeah, Supernatural's on!' and I was like, 'SLDKFJLKSDF CHANGE THE CHANNEL.' So we all stayed a while to watch Supernatural until one of us had to leave. So we ran to drop her off so we wouldn't miss much of Supernatural. And we went back home all puffed out and shebang. So Supernatural finished and I was about to make the call to get picked up, when I realized TEEN WOLF was on. Alas, it wasn't screening so I left at around 10ish. I'm glad her relatives didn't get visibly annoyed that I'd stayed there for such a long time.

I will blog about my report card soon enough.